Hello again!
Yet another blog for you! I wanted to give an update to my coming off the pill (it’s now been 3 months but I’m definitely still adjusting) and I’ve also got a story for you about how I absolutely convinced myself I was pregnant this month (spoiler alert, I wasn’t). This blog post will definitely involve TMI again, but let’s face it, you know what you’re in for with my blogs by now. The bottom line of this blog post is that the female body is both miraculous, horrific, amazing, disgusting, and very very complicated!
So, as I said, it’s now three months since I’ve come off the pill, and although the extreme symptoms have reduced (fire nips RIP), I am definitely still adjusting. Whether that is due to the “withdrawal” of the hormones (how dramatic) or me just learning what a natural body is like again, who knows! But it is definitely not just a one-month journey.
So let’s start with the story, and then I’ll summarise some of the symptoms and issues I’ve experienced. As I mentioned in my last pill related blog post, I am tracking ovulation for a variety of reasons (not because we’re trying for a baby before anyone gets excited!). I ovulated as normal this month, on cycle day 18. Had all the normal ovulation symptoms, bloating, sore boobs, minor cramping, and a positive ovulation test to confirm it. Normally after I’ve ovulated, my symptoms then disappear until my period, when I get the usual period symptoms.
This did not happen this month. My boobs continued to get sorer (and to my dismay, fire nips returned!), my sense of smell changed, my bloating didn’t seem to go down, my body temperature seemed slightly higher than normal, and I felt really tired all the time. On top of that, my emotions were going CRAZY. I was crying at everything. More than normal and for absolutely no reason. So I’m sure you’ve worked out by now, but I convinced myself that I was pregnant. Not from the ovulation I had just had, I know it doesn’t happen that quickly! But I convinced myself that I got pregnant just before my last period (unlikely but not impossible!), and that I was now 5-6 weeks pregnant. This came to an absolute head when on Tuesday night, I was getting waves of nausea on top of the other symptoms (in hindsight, that will have been caused by the massive amount of Chinese food I had just scoffed).
I’d tried to put it to the back of my mind because I knew how unlikely it was, but by Tuesday I couldn’t ignore it anymore. I was chatting to a friend about it (who has also had pregnancy scares in the past) and how I’d been so paranoid and it was getting worse, and she suggested to just a do test, and that way I would know either way, and at least I’d have piece of mind. I was going to order a bunch of tests on Amazon using Anthony’s prime account, but I literally couldn’t wait – it was driving me mad. Cue a late-night trip to Sainsburys!
I’d told Anthony a few days ago about my concerns, so when I told him I was going to get a test, he was so supportive. He insisted on coming with me, he helped me choose the test. Plied me with water to help me pee (honestly never needed a wee less – I ended up doing star jumps to try and get my bladder going! So ridiculous). He was patient while he waited for me to be ready to take the test, and he set the timer for the 3-minute wait. He also wanted to be there when the result was ready, but when I told him that selfishly, I would like to find out alone and then tell him, he was so amazing and totally understood.
Obviously, the test was negative – we both knew deep down but I needed the confirmation. That should have been it – the test was SO clearly negative, there was absolutely no doubt. And as I mentioned earlier, if I was pregnant, I would have been 5-6 weeks which means a test would definitely pick it up by then! However, the symptoms continued, and I was so lost as to what was causing them. Google didn’t help – Google was convinced I was pregnant. I’d even asked about long-term symptoms for coming off the pill – there was NOTHING on the internet that helped.
So the funny part of this story… turns out that my pregnancy symptoms were just PMS. I went to take another test on Friday morning, and was instead greeted with Mother Nature’s confirmation that I was definitely not pregnant!
From the moment my period started, all the other symptoms disappeared. Obviously, I stayed bloated and emotional, but that now made sense. But the sore boobs disappeared, the nausea went – my “weird” symptoms were now just full-blown period symptoms.
I wanted to write this post, as firstly, I know SO many women who have thought they were pregnant when they weren’t. I am learning currently more than ever to appreciate how complicated the female body is. It’s been so long since I had a proper period (10 years!) that I had genuinely forgotten what my PMS symptoms were. And I’d never noticed how similar ovulation, period, and pregnancy symptoms are!! It’s no wonder that women have no idea half the time if they’re coming or going!
I did a bit more digging on the internet once I knew I wasn’t pregnant, to try and work out what the symptoms I had between ovulation and period were. So the science actually suggests that once you ovulate, your progesterone remains at a set level (higher than normal) until you either have your period (then it drops to normal) or you’re pregnant (it increases, and you get your pregnancy symptoms). This explains why my boobs stayed sore, and my emotions were more unstable than usual. It doesn’t explain why this didn’t happen the previous 2 months, but I’m assuming that’s part of my body still adjusting! I don’t know whether this will be the case going forward, but at least I’ll be prepared this time and not spend a solid 2 weeks convinced I’m pregnant.
In terms of other symptoms/issues since coming off the pill, unfortunately I was not prepared for how bad my periods would be. I don’t want that to scare anyone who’s thinking about coming off, but I wish I’d been a bit more prepared. I had forgotten how bad my periods were as a teenager (very heavy and really bad cramps) – I think in my head I had put that down to the fact that I was a teenager with wild hormones, and that my periods got easier because I got older. But I think with hindsight, they actually got easier because I went on the pill (that was one of the reasons I went on it in the first place!). I’ve been absolutely useless this weekend, rendered pretty much incapacitated by my cramps – painkillers and hot water bottles being supplied on demand by my incredibly understanding husband! But unfortunately, they’re not really helping. We did manage to get out for a 7 mile walk today (had to stop for a chocolate cookie fix!), but I sat and cried in the shower for 10 minutes when we got back because the pain was so bad!
So my periods are hell, but I do feel very grateful that my reproductive system appears to be working exactly as it should. My first 2 cycles coming off the pill were 30 days, but this month was 28, which is what it should be. Obviously I know this is not confirmation that when I come to try for a baby it will work immediately, but I’m definitely assured by the fact that I seem to have a regular cycle (even if it is genuinely horrific for 4 days a month!)
That’s all I have for this post – the female body just absolutely blows my mind. We are very complicated creatures! I just wanted to share my “pregnancy scare” (I hate that term) in case it helps anyone else who’s worried currently – it’s probably just your normal cycle! But if you are concerned, get a test just so you at least have piece of mind. I’ve since ordered some cheap paper tests to keep in the cupboard, but now that I have a much better understanding of how my body works, hopefully they won’t be needed for a while.
That’s all for now, hopefully there will be another post coming soon!
Much love,
x
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